Passion Series: Motherhood

I started writing this blog in January. My daughter, Kess was 6 months old. We were living out of town and traveling for my husband's job. Kess' routine was dwindling (along with my sanity.) I felt like I wasn't quite cutout for this whole motherhood thing. I loved Kess, of course, but I felt like I wasn't doing right by her. I knew that my role of a mother was important, I just wasn't seeing it clearly. I wasn't seeing "results" of my mothering, the long nights and the routine building. I decided I needed something to make me, me. I talked (and cried) with Matt and told him how I was feeling. I told him I needed to try new things, to get out of the house, to go on a hot date and to be more than just a mom.

It felt great to try new things, to try a new date with Matt, to put effort into aspects of my life that hasn't seen effort in months or years. Then I realized something really important...

I loved being a mom. You see, my daughter didn't stay teeny forever. We taught her things like how to say, "momma" & "dadda." We helped her sit up, crawl and walk. She now snuggles me back as I sing primary songs to her before bed. She has become my little best friend. I absolutely love teaching her new things, watching her little mind work, making a new lunch for her to gobble down. I love that I know her. I know her likes and dislikes and how she likes to dance to the Octonauts song, or how she squeals when she sees her big puppy, Kane in the back yard. I love that she brings me my makeup and says, "dis?" Or how she claps whenever I praise her by saying, "Yay!"

Being new to this whole motherhood thing, I didn't know that this is what my life would turn into. I thought it would be long nights, making routines, painful breast feedings, and exhaustion forever. It wasn't. It's a whole new world of love, of understanding, of eternal gratefulness to my Heavenly Father and still a little bit of exhaustion ;)

In the early months of Kess' life I felt a little obsolete. I knew she needed me, but I didn't realize how much I needed her. I know that sometimes as mothers we feel like our job is tiring, boring and  thankless and heck, we don't even get paid to do it. I know that we sometimes lose sight of who we are when we become moms. I am trying hard to create balance in my life, to be 100% committed to being a mom, a wife and myself. It's not an easy thing to do and that's ok. I love being a mom to Kess, a wife to Matt, because they make me, me.

I started this blog to find passion and I won't stop looking for ways to branch out, trying new date nights with my husband, or teach Kess new things, but I now know that I am incredibly passionate about being a mom. I can honestly say that it completes who I am. I am way more than just a mom, I'm her mom.

Weekend Shenanigans & THE Green Smoothie

We just got back from a fun-filled weekend in McCall, Idaho. Actually the weather was a little blah, so it made it the perfect weekend to do nothing. We bummed around with friends, ate late breakfasts, read books, chased Kess (a lot) & stayed up too late watching TV. A lazy weekend in a beautiful place! 

We actually lived in McCall for a few months while Kess was teeny tiny. We moved there in September of last year and moved back home in March of this year. So Kess spent about 7 months of her life traveling back & forth from McCall to Nampa, so we could be with Daddy while he was working & we drove back to Nampa so Mommy could work. It was a wild ride, but we are oh so glad we did it. 

We obviously ate way too much junk while we were weekending. We have actually had some unhealthy food habits going on for a few weeks now between bring home that giant chocolate Costco cake, to birthday celebrations, to fair food, to weekend getaways... we have been bad. I'm pretty sure even Kess could use a juice cleanse at this point! ;) 

My favorite way to make sure I'm getting some good nutrients is to make a green smoothie. Now, there are a million different green smoothie recipes. I've tried quite a few and could never find one I actually liked, until this one. My sister got this recipe from a good friend, and loved it, so I gave it a try. So good. Kess even loves it, which is awesome because sometimes babies aren't the easiest of eaters, so this insures that she gets some good healthy food in that cute little belly of hers.

3/4 Cup Frozen Blueberries

3/4 Cup Nonfat Greek Yogurt (I use vanilla, because I hate plain)

1 frozen banana

a few handfuls of spinach

1 T of Chia Seeds 

1 Cup of Orange Juice.

I would have never thought to freeze the banana, but it helps keep the smoothie from going weirdly frothy. Bonus. 

It's super easy to "smoothie prep" with this smoothie. I slice up the bananas, place them in plastic bags, and put them in the freezer. They are easy to grab quickly and easy to blend because they are in smaller slices. I recently decided to be "pinteresty" & blend my spinach because it would go bad before I could use it all. I added some water and handfuls of spinach into my blender & blended until it was all liquefied

, poured it into an ice tray and froze it. After it was fully frozen I broke it up into pieces and put them in a plastic bag in my freezer, they are easy to throw into the blender.

I found Kess a few tiny tumblers to drink her smoothie from. She loves them, but the only tricky thing with tumblers is that she can pull the straw almost all the way out, they get caught at the bottom which is nice, but it still makes quite the mess. I grabbed a rubber band and wrapped it around the straw at point that hits under the tumbler top. Then she can't pull it out at all. It makes for a much easier clean up! :)

Do you have a favorite green smoothie recipe? I would love to give it a try!

Happy Monday, my friends! Have a great week! 

Fair 2015

#BEbucketlist #15

I love the fair! Mostly, I love the food! OK, all I love is the food! We didn't go last year because Kess was so teeny tiny, so I was really looking forward to a corn dog this year! ;)

We celebrated my momma's birthday at the fair!! So we threw caution to the wind and ate 4,753 calories.

Kess is just like me when it comes to animals... she likes to look, not touch!

We tried to take the babies on a few family rides, but they were too little, even with us riding with them. So we walked around played a few games. I was dying to go on the swings, so my parents watched Kess for a bit and Matt and I hopped in line for the carousal swings. I must be getting old, because I basically paid $10 to feel nauseated haha! At one point I looked back at Matt and he asked how I was doing, "Only okay!" "Same here!!" Yep, not quiet the adventurers we used to be.

Matt loves to look at the art in the expo building, so we wandered around. Kess really wanted to push her stroller so I let Matt look around & we found an open area to "stroll."

We (again) grabbed a bit more food. Kess got to eat grandma's ice cream potato, which she loved. This babe woofed down half a corn dog, a good amount of lemonade, more sips of Pepsi that we intended & got a snocone. Don't worry, we actually feed her healthy food from time to time ;)

The babies were officially done & ready for bed, so we took off & washed the fair off of Kess & got that girl to bed. My parents came by & we played a round of Klondike Rummy. At that point I was delirious because it was so late (11:00pm)... We wrapped up cards, I lost, and went to bed! Such a fun weekend! I love when we get a chance to do something we wouldn't normally do. Most of our weekends are filled with yard work, house work, or other little odds and ends, so when we get a chance to play in Boise, or go to the fair - it's a great weekend! :)

Cost Per Use

Ok, let me preface this post by saying that I feel kinda goobery for posting things that I've purchased. I feel like I'm bragging about things I bought, but I had some people wondering what I snagged while shopping in SLC.

We had saved up for my SLC getaway for a quite while. I wanted to be able to shop without remorse. Well, that's just not in my personality. I feel buyer's remorse for everything. It's the dumbest thing, really. Can't get over it, no matter how I try. I have come to terms with the fact that it's a good thing; it keeps me from over spending.

I was determined to buy things I needed, but I wanted to buy a few things I had been eyeing on a few fashion blogs I follow, too. So, I decided to make a list of the things I needed, buck up, get over my shopping guilt and enjoy!

I actually rarely shop - we don't budget for it. I don't even have a monthly "fun" allowance. We have some financial goals that keep getting in the way of fun ;) I get birthday money & Christmas money. I try to make it last as long as possible. My birthday is in June, so if I plan well, I can stretch my birthday money all the way until Christmas & a wonderful cycle ensues.

I never know if something I buy is going to be worth the money or not. Fashion bloggers always seem to be snagging the most expensive stuff & swearing by it. Well ya - it better be worth it if it costs that much. I always seem to be looking for a "dupe" of whatever product I'm on the hunt for. Sometimes that pays off, but sometimes you end up needing to "invest" in the more expensive product. When needing to invest, I take on a "Cost Per Use" mentality when shopping. How much is this product going to cost me each time I use it? Will I get my money's worth?

I recently bought a pair of jeans that were super inexpensive. I caught a good sale & had a store coupon. I liked them for about a month, then they lost their shape and I always felt like they were saggy around my but, unless I was washing them after each use. Not cute. So, during my Utah shopping trip I was determined to find a great, long-lasting, comfortable pair of jeans. And I wanted jeans, not jeggings, not lots of stretch. Well, I found some on sale! Thank you, #nsale. Thankfully they were not the original $225, but still. (insert heartbroken emoji here.) After much convincing from my sister in the dressing room and one hesitant swipe of my card later... I'm the proud owner of these beauts! I know, kinda cringe-worthy. But, I have zero buyer's remorse. Really. If I break these down with my "cost per use" tool, I actually don't end up "spending" much per wear. I constantly wear skinny jeans. Almost everyday, actually, even in the summer. I'm most comfortable in them, and I think they are flattering. Even if I wear these for 1/2 of the year, my cost per use is under $1/day. I can justify this because I know it is a fact that I will wear these until they die. That's what I do.

How do you justify expensive clothing? Do you just go for it? Do you debate back and forth like I do? Or do you veto expensive clothing and continually buy less expensive (a choice I often make)?

Here are a few more staple items I bought while in SLC -
Caslon Pencil Skirt - purchased in black and navy for church. I like to look "dressed up" at church. I typically stray away from a casual look, but I am chasing Kess around now, so that changes my church attire. These skirts are durable, comfortable, flattering and on sale! Bonus!
Pleione Pleat Back Woven Top - Blouses were one of the top things on my shopping list and I snagged these on sale as well. I bought 2, because they were 2 for $60, and they still are if you're in need of a great blouse! I would normally cringe at a $30-$40 shirt, but these were comfortable, super flattering and could be worn with my new pencil skirt, or my new jeans... #winwin. I bought Cream (which is actually more white than cream) and the Blue Mazarine. There are actually more colors online than there were in store, which tempted me to purchase 2 extra colors (Pink Hush & Purple) I am a t-shirt and jeans kind of girl and I'm trying to feel less frumpy, more put-together and these are the perfect blouses for that.

I hope this was helpful for those of you trying to decide if something you want is going to be worth it.. plug in "cost per use" ;)

I snagged a few things from Lush that I am loving as well! If that sounds interesting, let me know & I'll share a few of my favorites!

Happy Wednesday! xoxo

Girls Trip to SLC

My sister, Santanna and I have been planning this get away since we were knee deep in diapers, baby vomit and breastfeeding. We decided that once we were both done breastfeeding that we would jet the heck outta town. Easier said than done - because we are kind of emotionally attached to our babies! We were all talk for a little while, but we made it happen. It was a glorious weekend.
Our husbands worked from home on Friday, so we took off around 9:00am. We drove straight through Salt Lake City to Draper... Hello IKEA! I had never been to IKEA, so I was pretty giddy! I already can't wait to go back! So many IKEA hacks floating around in my brain!

We checked into our hotel downtown SLC, grabbed some food and rented an overly priced movie in our hotel room. Worth it. 
We didn't really sleep in... mostly because we are moms and our brains are programmed to wake up early, so we got ready, grabbed a quick breakfast and walked around Temple Square while we waiting for City Creek Mall to open. We started in Nordstrom so we could focus our energy into the #Nsale!! We didn't plan to be in Salt Lake during the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale - that was a very happy coincidence! To make a long story short, we shopped until we dropped. We took a small break and drove to Toys R Us to grab toys for the babies, and then went back to City Creek to snag all the purchases we were unsure about before ;) Instead of venturing out and trying some fancy restaurant for dinner, we grabbed personal pizza from Pizza Factory, (not enough) chocolate from Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory, changed into our jammies and ate pizza in bed. So cozy.

I got a text from Matt on Saturday saying, "Kane did it, so Kess wanted to..." with this picture attached! I almost died from the cuteness! This babe is an outside girl! She loves being in the backyard with Kane!

The next morning we sorted through all of our purchases, packed our bags, called down to get our car (we paid for valet parking - one of the best decisions of the entire trip), and headed off to Bruges Waffles... best waffle of my life. I wouldn't lie to you. Santanna and I ordered the basic waffle with strawberries and whipped cream. We figured it would be good because - let's face it, a waffle is a waffle, right? Wrong, dude. Not all waffles are created equal. These were sweet, crispy, sugary deliciousness. I'm not sure I can ever eat a regular waffle and not feel some disappointment. Ok, that was a really long paragraph about a waffle. Moving on...

We drove a little too fast to get home to our hubbies and babies... go figure. Kess girl was asleep when I got home. I was a little bummed, but got over it quickly when Matt said, "So... show me what you bought!" Once Kess woke up and I gave her a bottle, let her wake up for a minute and then she gave me tight squeezes! Oh it was the best feeling ever! She has never hugged me so tight! She looks so big in this picture, too. She's still tiny, don't worry! ;)

I'll do a post on my shopping budget and how I decide if something is worth purchasing or not. I like to get more bang for my buck! ;) I found some great staple pieces over the weekend that I am oddly giddy about! 

Kess' 1st Birthday

Celebrating Kess' 1st Birthday was bittersweet, but mostly sweet. I know I've mentioned this before, but I wasn't sure I was going to survive motherhood. It was so much harder than I had anticipated. I was so sure that I would never get used to having her around, never get used to carting her with me everywhere and most certainly never get used to putting her needs before mine. Then all of the sudden, all of the things I was so worried about became my new "normal." I can't imagine my life without her and I know Matt feels the same way. We often talk about how we don't only emotionally love her, but we love her spiritually as well. What a blessing!

This last year has been the hardest of my life (so far), but it has also been the most magical. I have never known a love like the love I feel for Kess. To watch her grow, develop, learn and change has been one of the best things I have ever witnessed. Being a parent is truly magical.

I picked Kess' watermelon theme waayyy before I should have even been thinking about her 1st birthday. I didn't want to spend a ton of money on her party, even though it's a milestone for our family - I have seen too many people drop way too much money into what should be a simple, yet exciting occasion. We decided on a backyard bbq with our parents, grandparents and siblings. It was great weather! Started out hot, then overcast, then down-poured right after the cake smash - excellent timing.

We had the typical BBQ cuisine - hot dogs, hamburgers, an array of homemade salads (thanks to everyone who brought food), fruit & veggies, and homemade desserts! I decided to make Kess' smash cake and the other sweet treats, mostly because those things add up quickly.

My sister & I made watermelon shaped sugar cookies with royal frosting. It was our first time making and using royal frosting - trickier than it looks, kids! I think they turned out great & we only had one toddler/cookie incident - bonus! ;)

I made the cupcakes, (my favorite) buttercream frosting and the cupcake toppers. The cake was just a box cake, but split into 3 pans and dyed different shades of hot pink. I had never done an ombre cake before, so that was fun to try! The toppers were super easy, just scrapbook paper, cut into two different sized circles, glued together & cut in half! I used the same paper to make her "ONE" banner, using this printable template.

Kess girl was totally spoiled by all of her family - so many toys (as if she didn't have enough already.) I actually kept some packaged up and stuck them in the closet to pull out later. I am trying to rotate her toys. Little babes seem to get bored of their toys quickly, so I figure if I have a rotation going we can avoid that.

Kess' cute watermelon dress is from Alligator Lane. This was the only thing I couldn't make for Kess - I mean, I could have tried, but I figured I would save myself the frustration & buy something well made. This dress was perfect, so adorable and she will still be able to wear to church or out and about.

Thanks for all your party detail inquiries, I love being able to share this stuff with you all! I really enjoyed keeping Kess' party low budget, intimate and fun! It was the perfect day! Have a great weekend you guys!!

Fourth of July

I hope you all had a great 4th! I'm pretty sure I say this every holiday, but holidays sure are different with kids. Granted, last year I was 38 weeks pregnant, so I wasn't lighting fireworks and running for dear life like usual - I was waddling and sweating. This year we were home early, got our little miss tucked into bed and prayed that our jack-wagon (my new favorite swear word) neighbors didn't wake Kess up with their obnoxious fireworks. (did that make me sound old?)

Our 4th was actually really great! We had a BBQ at my sister's house, had lots of family over, the babies got to play in the mini pool, play with toys, be the center of attention and have the crap scared out of them by fireworks. We lit a of those pretty colored smoke bombs for the babies, thinking they would love them... they didn't really care. I, of course cared very much because I really wanted to get an "Instagram-worthy" picture of Kess with pretty colored smoke in the background... eh, such is life! ;) We also lit a few (what we thought were) sparkly fireworks, but they ended up going off like a car back-fire and Kess clung to me for dear life, bawling. It was awful! We felt so bad and thus ended the firework fun. So we all gathered in the living room with lots of toys and let the babies play until their hearts content!

We made matching shirts for the BBQ. Because everyone needs a 4th of July shirt, right?! Yes. We decided to sew these cute little pockets on... trickier than it looks. Don't look to closely. I have moderate sewing skills, remember? ;) It was actually a fun little project, but might have to wear it for a couple of years to make up for the trouble (and seam ripping.)

Sunday we went to church in the morning and relaxed all afternoon! It was so nice to not have a thing to do. We watched movies, Kess napped well, we played fetch with Kane and went for a bike ride. I scored a bike trailer at a yard sale. Kess loves it!

And, the most exciting of the weekend shenanigans... Kess took her first steps!! It was so exciting! Obviously, more for Matt and I, but still! She did so great. She's still wobbly and defiant. We try to stand her up to walk and she won't put her feet down. I wonder where she gets that from? We are super excited for this next milestone! It's so fun to watch her grow and learn! We've been practicing lots over the last few days so she'll be running away from me in no time! ;)

I hope you all had a wonderful 4th of July with your loved ones! Stay tuned for Kess' birthday fun next week!